Repost: because it got lost in the shuffle: As Promised… Jamieson Wolf

And just in time, as my space bar has decided to only work part time. Now I need to smash it to get it to work, and have broken a nail.

The trials of being a writer, I tell you!

Without further ado, or spaces….
Giving Me the World
I used to be terrified to date. I was worried that men would judge me unworthy of their attention when I should have judged them unworthy of mine. My self-worth was so low that I equated sex with love.

Dating was made more difficult when I was stricken with Multiple Sclerosis on New Years Eve 2012. Now men not only judged my looks, they were afraid of me or they belittled me. When I was still walking with my cane, I had one man wave his hand at it saying “What’s that?”

I looked at my cane and then at him and said “It’s my cane.”

He rolled his eyes and said “Yes, but what are you doing with it?”

I remember my mouth opening up wide in wonder. When I closed it I replied: “I need it to walk.”

He scoffed. “Well, it must be nice being half a man.”

Needless to say, the date didn’t go well.

I had another man call me broken, still another who asked me why I persisted in pretending I had some disease when I could be whole and healthy if I chose to. I had one ask me how I could be so happy when I was so sick.

“Because I choose to be.” I told him.

After a string of horrible dates, I had given up on men. My dating life hadn’t been too great to start with, now it was the shits. However, just when I had given up, I met Michael.

He was an entirely different kind of man. He didn’t judge me, didn’t reprimand or make fun of me. Instead, he supported me and loved me completely.

It took a little while for me to trust him and not to run away. I wanted to run at first because he wasn’t treating me terribly. I know that sounds horrible, but anyone that has been in an abusive relationship will understand.

When Michael told me that he loved me the first time, it was as if a sun went off inside of me, filling all of me with a vibrant light. I remember standing there for a few seconds before saying “I love you too.” And the light increased.

Almost two years later, that love has grown and the light continues to grow, chasing away the shadows. We’ve travelled to different parts of the world, but more than that, Michael has helped me to travel to different parts of myself and helped me to engage with life again.

He really has given me the world and so I wrote this poem for him. Love you Michael.

You Have Given Me The World
From the moment

that we met,

my life has

been filled with

light. As our

love has continued

to grow, I’ve

changed. Now, instead

of hiding and

hoping for a

better life, I’m

living it. Instead

of wishing for

magic, I’m creating

it. Instead of

shying away from

all of life’s

pleasures, I’m embracing

them. Rather than

shy away from

anything, I’m meeting

things head on

unafraid of what

will happen. Instead

of waiting for

life to happen

to me, I’m making

my life happen.

Rather than try

to change me

into something that

you wanted me

to be, you

accepted me as

I was, as I

am, embracing all

of me and

all that I

could be. You

believe in me

even when my

belief in myself

flags or wavers.

You love even

the parts of

me that I

didn’t love and

now I see

myself in a

different light, through

a different lens.

You have changed

my life into

something so wonderful.

You have also

turned the world

from a mystery

waiting to be

solved into something

waiting to be

discovered. You’ve shown

me what true

love really is

and I’m a

better man because

of you. You’ve

given me the

world and I’m

eternally grateful for

your light. You

have given me

the world and

I can’t wait

to discover it

with you.”
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Web site: www.jamiesonwolf.com

Blog: www.jamiesonwolfauthor.wordpress.com

Facebook: www.facebook.com/jamiesonwolf

Twitter: www.twitter.com/jamiesonwolf
Buy a copy of Dancing with the Flame here:

http://www.amazon.com/Dancing-Flame-Jamieson-Wolf-ebook/dp/B01AL29MDM/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1454463181&sr=8-1&keywords=dancing+with+the+flame+jamieson+wolf

Well… that was dumb.

I just spent all day trying to get the verification email from my web-host so that I could help set up another author’s website under Corvid Moon Publishing. Because, ya know, more authors equals more money to pay the web-host.

Hours of frustration, searching for hidden folders it might have gone to for unexplainable reasons and guess what?

I typed in my email address wrong. After 14 years of owning that address, I did it wrong.

So it turned out that I couldn’t “change” the email address until I verified the first one. Le sigh…  I hate help lines.

But there was no help for it, it had to be fixed on their end. And SURPRISE!!!  After I remembered my PIN, it was painless.  Now I have to wait up to an hour for the change to be implemented. THAT will be hard.

My non-existent pain…

Tomorrow morning bright and early, we leave on a ten hour drive to my Mom’s to help with her wedding.  It’s both stressful (Mom reports turning into a 16 yo bridezilla) and incredibly cute.

So, I spent all day yesterday packing for a 2 week trip, and was supposed to spend today getting the house ready to be empty.  Like emptying the fridge of rottables.

Instead of sleeping last night, I was up all night with severe pain in my non-existent gall bladder. I had my gall bladder removed almost 2 years ago, and I’m still having attacks?  Worse than when I had it?!  The very definition of unfair.

I am so tired and sore today it’s not funny.  But I’ve still got so much to do.  Like refreezing the freezer packs. And bringing down the box of stuff for Mom.

I’m betting that the love of my life didn’t get much sleep either because there was no position that lessened the pain. But I still shifted around looking for it. Constantly.

I was also supposed to write a review of an ARC I received. I wanted it done before we headed down east, but my brain is poutine today. Messy, squishy, some parts hot, some cold… you get the idea.

Maybe I can write the review on my tablet in the car tomorrow, and upload when we get to my Mom’s?

I won! IwonIwonIwon!

I entered a short story contest put on by Radish a few weeks ago. Radish is an online story sharing app, kind of a pro-level Wattpad. Except that it just goes to Mac Apple products for now. (They are working on an Android app)

I entered a short story based in my world for Nets to Catch the Wind. It stars Thalia, one of the supporting characters. The contest rules were that it must involve flashbacks triggered by a shot in a bar. So I wrote some backstory to my backstory.

And it won best fantasy!

Great news to come back from Ad Astra to, eh?  Which was great on its own, btw.

So, I’m not sure how much I can say about my biggest bestest thing that happened, I’ll have to wait for permission, but it was awesome!

I also got to chat with amazing authors, buy tons of new books, and see a couple great panels. I got to party with a writer whose work I love. And… I seem to have been promised a panel or seminar on taxes and the authorpreneur at Can-Con 2016!

They want to call it “What to do with those fracking receipts!”  LOL, I can work with that.

 

Book reviews

Or “Things I torture my friends with for 1000, Alex”.
As of Jan 1st, I’m a reviewer for Apt613.com.  It’s an online literary review magazine. I requested local indie authors, and have already received my first book.
Human, by S.M. Carrière. I’m really looking forward to it, I met her at Can-Con last year and she seemed pretty awesome. She did a panel on historical fantasy that I got a lot out of. And she did it all in vampire teeth!
I had started reading an earlier book of hers, now I’m not sure whether I should start the new one or finish the first one. Probably do the review first, I’m only a chapter and a bit in, though I was blown away from the first paragraph.
Soon I hope to receive my second book; a “how-to” for writers on overcoming writer’s block. ( Caroline Frechette) While my problem is usually too many stories, not too few, this would still have helped during my 2 year blank page nightmare.
They both also fill one of my goals for 2016, to read one “how-to” book on writing or self-publishing per month, and to read 24 fiction books this year.
Or is that 2 goals?

I am also still struggling with my epic fantasy; I may have to separate out 2 story lines for separate books. And deal with the big reveal being revealed 3X. Although it would work fabulously in any of those spots. So… push it as late as possible? Try for a reveal of something every plot point?
The secondary characters’ big reveals are also revealed twice each. I guess I love my reveals. And have short term memory problems. Also my memory sucks.
I need to struggle my way through this first read-through, making notes of what’s out of place, what needs fixing, etc. And get it all into same font, same size, same paragraph style… why did it do this?
Then I can make a plan and a process for finishing draft 2… maybe a list… I love my lists. My dear hubby says he married me for my lists….
Where was I?
Oh, yeah. I thought editing was easier….

A different view of used books

Monday I published a link to Kristen Lamb’s blog on why you should buy your books new, mostly that the writer gets paid. Later, there was a huge online debate about her post (not mine, her original post).

“Over the past week the author blogosphere has been taken over with a debate on getting paid. Kristen Lamb sparked the discussion on  Tuesday when she wrote a post arguing that authors who want to make a living should only promote channels that get them paid, and that sparked a long debate on The Passive Voice as well as commentary on Teleread.”

From The Digital Reader.

In this article, they quote Neil Gaiman as saying that the fan is more important than the buyer, or words to that effect.  On further thought, I agree with him.  While Kristen still has the valid point that writers make very little of the cover price, and it’s getting harder to make any real money to live on… Neil is also right. Free books, used books, shared books, libraries… they create new fans, or supply your book to a fan who can’t afford $33.95 right now, but may very well buy the book later.

Or may write you a fan letter that astonishes you. Or lends the book to someone who goes nuts buying your backlist. Or something. So, yeah.

But I still need more reviews, so maybe thank writers for their works you read or free by reviewing them on Amazon?

Guest blogger coming soon!

My longtime friend, Jamieson Wolf, has another book of stories out. This quote perfectly explains it.  And why, when he was looking for blog to jump onto (no pun intended) I was quick to put up my hand.

It’s actually a re-release, an updated edition of my book of fairy tales titled When Love Blooms. 

I’ve always loved fairy tales and the magic they carry. My goal with When Love Blooms was to write about all different kinds of love. 

Here’s a bit about the collection: 

Welcome to the village of Inglewood Hamlet. 

Nestled between a large forest and sprawling mountains, Inglewood Hamlet is home to many. Some that live within the village are like us. Others that live there have powers told in myth, legend and lore. 

There, magic runs free. There, you might meet a Mermaid longing for her lost love. You might happen upon a shape shifter who has never known true love. You might chance to hear a conversation between a Dryad and a Queen, or witness the reunion between a King and his Fool. 

There are all kinds of Love in Inglewood Hamlet. And all you have to do is let Love bloom…”

Review of A. I. Chronicles

The A.I. ChroniclesThe A.I. Chronicles by Samuel Peralta
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

The A.I. Chronicles, an anthology of science fiction
edited by Ellen Campbell
There’s a meme on FaceBook; “I’ll go to bed as soon as I read one more chapter… oh look! Another chapter.” This is that book, except it’s short stories.
I knew that I would like the book, I love science fiction, I loved Asimov’s robot series. But I don’t usually like short stories, I like to get inside a story and crawl around, make myself at home. Short stories are… well, short.
But, this book was amazing. Literally, and I was an English major, so I mean literally.
The stories pull you in fast, and manage, in a few short pages, to scare you, enthrall you, and make you glare suspiciously at your smart phone. Especially the Syntax of Consciousness by Pavarti K. Tyler, and Left Foot on a Blind Man by Julie Czerneda. I may never trust my MP3 player again.
All this to say; this is an excellent compilation, go buy it. Now.

View all my reviews

A poem just for us… I think…

Last week the Faboosh Jamieson Wolf was a guest blogger here.  His writing is always so deep and heartfelt. I love it when he writes a blog just for me, but I’m greedy, I wanted more.  More!

MOAR!

And he gave it to me.  🙂

No, mom, not because I scared him…. I think…

But either way, he sent long a poem that ties to the theme of his guest post last Thursday.  Exclusive for me/ us, until his next book comes out.  But in the meantime, who doesn’t love a man who respects and adores his mother?

The Voice of Inspiration

(Jamieson Wolf)

 

* Dedicated to my Wonder Mum, who said the words that shone through the water.

 

You should only write if you’re inspired.

Her voice was

a balm to me.

She was

my touchstone, my

rock. I thought

of what she

said, of her

wisdom. I thought

of the endless

nights I had

spent trying to

see through the

fog that engulfed

me, of the

frustration of looking

at a blank

screen. It mocked

me like an

unblinking eye. I

tried to give

words to what

I was feeling.

I’m a writer. I can’t be a writer if I don’t write.

Her voice became

softer. It was

the voice I

always called to

mind when I

imagined her speaking

to me. Hearing

it was no

different. It was

instantly, incredibly comforting:

You will always be a writer, whether or not you’re writing. It’s in you, it’s what you do. It’s who you are. Let the words come on their own. They will come when they are ready.

I carried her

words home with

me, as if

they had a

physical form. When

I got home,

I was weighed

down. I put

my hands in

my pockets and

found they were

full of stones.

Each stone had

a word painted

on one side

in metallic paint

that looked like

water. I let

the stones fall

where they would

onto the floor.

Everywhere a stone

fell, water began

to spread from

beneath it, until

my floor was

covered in water

as deep as

an ocean. I looked

at all the

words shining from

underneath the waves.

Now that I

was no longer

weighed down by

them, it was

time to swim

into the water

and see what

the words had

to say to

me.

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OOps, turns out that it’s not new and exclusive.  The blog entry was, but the poem is from Talking With the earth.  My mistake.  (I still love it.)

Guest Blogger, Jamieson Wolf.

I mentioned that I was having my friend Jamieson do a guest post this week about his new book.

Well, today is the day!  It seems like everyone asks the same ol’ questions in a Q&A, and I figure that you can just Google it, if that’s what you want to see (or email him, he’s really sweet, he’ll likely answer you), so I made him work for it!

This is a unique, just for us, written for me, post by Jamieson.

*****************************************************************************

Remembering to Slow Down

One of my goals for 2014 was to slow down.
In 2012, I had twenty three books of mine published. While I had been writing one book, I was editing two or three of them and then promoting the books that had already come out. I also work full time. I had one job during the day: mild mannered office employee. I also had another job during the night: writer. I was a literary super hero.
Then in January of 2013, my life changed. I was struck with Multiple Sclerosis. I had to learn how to walk again, to talk again, how to see. I had to teach myself to type all over again. From January to April, I wasn’t able to write.
I could only get a few words out at a time. Where I had been able to write a few thousand words in one sitting, I was able to only write five or ten. I stitched those words together into poems. Those poems became Talking to the Sky.
I published that collection in 2014. I thought it would be my first release of the year, so sure was I that I had more books and novels coming. In the end, however, Talking to the Sky was my only release for 2014.
At first, that bothered me. I felt like a failure. I had so many words inside of me that were crying to get out. When I wasn’t writing, the words were still there, patiently waiting for release. However, I had to examine how I was going about things, how I was writing.
I would sit at the computer waiting for the words to come out and nothing would come. I would bemoan the fact that, except for the odd poem, my words had essentially left me. Then my mother gave me a crucial piece of advice.
“You should only write when you’re inspired to do so.” She said.
“What do you mean?”
“You’re different now. Your words have more power as there aren’t as many of them. You can’t just expect the words to flow as they used to. You should only write when you’re inspired to do so.”
It took me a while to wrap my brain around that one. I was so used to sitting down at the computer and letting the words pour out. Now I had to force them to go onto the page. So I tried something different.
I followed my mother’s advice and wrote only when I was moved to do so. I slowed down and relished in the act of doing so. We’re a society built around go go go that we miss the good things in life, the great things.
I slowed down. I read more, went for walks, I painted canvasses and pieces of art. I started loving myself and ended up falling in love.
Soon, my words morphed into short stories and there were more poems. Still though, when the end of 2014 came, I felt I hadn’t written enough. There were still so many words to be used, so many stories waiting to be told.
I received a shock when I collected the poems contained in Talking with the Earth, however. Talking to the Sky was only 220 pages long. Talking with the Earth was 420 pages. So I took a look at what I had written last year. Along with essays, articles and blog posts and both my blogs, I had written enough short stories for a new collection.
I was stunned. I had no idea that I’d written so much in one year. I had written more than I than I realized and it all came from slowing down and waiting until the words wanted to be written.
Thanks Mom.

***************************************************************************

Tune in early next week, for that original, exclusive poem I mentioned.  I’m so excited!

And here are the links to his book, US, and CAN.

And here’s the cover.

talking Earth 2

And him.

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